LIGO: The months ahead

AUGUST:

Traditionally in August the Kavli Laureates of the year meet with the President of the United States in the Oval Office for a photo-op. So President Obama’s legacy will include a photograph with two of the cleverest science scammers in history: Kip Thorne and Rainer Weiss.

India will announce the long-overdue site selection for LIGO India and the formation of the Indian LIGO Management Team. Heavy earth-moving equipment will roll in and start sculpting the gigantic “scarlet letter” L on the landscape.

This heady trip the Indian Ligonauts are on will needlessly cost the Indian taxpayers thousands of crores of rupees, with no end in sight. Unfortunately for them, the Indian physics establishment – whose duty and responsibility it was to stop this scourge – stands by idly and sucks their thumbs.

SEPTEMBER:

The Kavli Prize award ceremony. Norway will get all festive and festooned to fete the said scammers. Photo-op with Norwegian Royalty.

Shaw Prize ceremony for the said scammers will take place in Hong Kong.

OCTOBER:

The scientific establishment, the American media and the said scammers expect the announcement of the award of the Nobel Prize for physics to the said scammers ( “a sure bet”, … “a shoo-in”,…).

President Obama will meet again with the said scammers for a second photo-op, this time in their role as Nobel Laureates.

NOVEMBER:

Breakthrough Prize Ceremonies. Yuri Milner will rent a couple of Hollywood celebrities to help fete the said scammers. As in the past, the media will photograph the celebrities and report on their low-cut dresses. The media and the celebrities will totally ignore the awardees. Then the awardees will stand awkwardly in a row, each holding a silly wire contraption and wearing an embarrassed smile. Then they will dine on sturgeon caviar.

DECEMBER:

Nobel Prize award ceremony. Photo-ops for the said scammers with the Swedish Royalty.

LORD HAVE MERCY!

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